


We Fill in Each Other's Blanks

by rinnenotsubasa



Category: SEVENTEEN (Band)
Genre: Abusive Family, Friendship, High School AU, In more ways than one, Multi, Romance, Wonwoo is not a lone wolf but he’s quiet, finally writing a fic in honor of my profpic, honorstudent!Mingyu, nothing graphic though, thug!Hao
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-03-11
Updated: 2017-04-25
Packaged: 2018-10-02 16:05:12
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 8
Words: 18,767
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10222124
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/rinnenotsubasa/pseuds/rinnenotsubasa
Summary: Wonwoo only looked at the fence; Minghao jumped over it.Minghao fell and tried to get back up by dragging his legs; Wonwoo reminded Minghao that he didn’t have to do it alone.





	1. Chapter 1

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Wonwoo had never dreamed of jumping over the fence. That was until he met Minghao.

His right foot hit the wooden box at the top of the pile, propelling him up and towards the fence. The stack of boxes collapsed as soon as his foot hit it, but the boy didn’t flail his limbs in panic. His body still keeping the form of that of a long jump athlete, his eyes undeterred.

And just like that the boy, Pledis High School’s notorious troublemaker Xu Minghao, jumped over the fence and into the free world.

From where he sat under a nearby tree, a book on his lap, Wonwoo wondered how it felt to jump like that.

 

**

 

“I don’t know why you try hard to keep your studious bookworm persona. There’s no one here.”

The voice tore Wonwoo’s gaze away from the field where the school’s marching band was having their daily practice. He turned his face towards the direction of the voice and saw Xu Minghao standing just outside the shade of this tree that Wonwoo leaned on. It was the first time he saw the infamous sophomore after witnessing the latter’s jumping ability several days ago at the very same spot.

Wonwoo didn’t reply to Minghao’s question; he just stared. He knew it was rude, but he couldn’t help it as he was stunned. They had nothing in common except for being in the same year. Wonwoo thought he would graduate high school without even exchanging one conversation with Xu Minghao.

“You hadn’t touched your book for like—“ Minghao rummaged his pants’ right pocket and pulled out his phone. “—10 minutes or so. Just staring at the field.”

The words made Wonwoo regained his sense and now he could feel his fingers splayed across the open pages of his book, lying forgotten on his lap. He looked down and saw that he hadn’t even gone past page 10.

Lifting his head back up, Wonwoo said, “And what were you doing for 10 minutes?”

“I wanted to ask you if I can sit there but you seemed so occupied. Your gaze was intense. And at times you smiled; your stone-cold face suddenly smiled, it was kinda creepy.”

It surprised Wonwoo how much Minghao’s words revealed about his own self that he didn’t even realize.

“I was just... I like the arrangement, the trumpet part, and the formation.” Wonwoo stopped at that. He didn’t know why he felt like he needed to explain to someone he barely knew. He usually wouldn’t care if people thought of him as weird.

Minghao hummed. There was no mocking in his tone.

“So you don’t mind me joining you, eh?”

“It’s the school’s ground. Not mine.”

Minghao rolled his eyes before coming to the empty spot on Wonwoo’s left side. Wonwoo noticed that Minghao was slightly dragging his left leg.

“Can’t jump. Fell the other day.” Minghao said as he sat down. “So I’m stuck here until it’s dark enough for Kang to give up and go home.”

Wonwoo knew Minghao’s reputation and relationship with Mr. Kang, their history teacher and also coordinator of school’s student guidance. So he had a rough image of Minghao’s situation now.

“If you just do it, it will be over before you know it.”

Wonwoo saw Minghao giving him an incredulous look.

“I am not cleaning the toilet with Kang drilling stares to the back of my head and keep telling me to scrub the same spot over and over again.”

Wonwoo just shrugged and Minghao laid his back on the ground.

Wonwoo had never paid attention to the school’s notorious troubled student. He only knew that Minghao had been into detention more than anyone in this school (Mr. Kang always complained about it at least once during lesson, even though Minghao was not in Wonwoo’s class). The reasons seemed to be nothing too serious; skipping lessons to sneak into the rooftop and sleep there, breaking at least two rules on how students’ appearance should be every single day, stuffs like that. Wonwoo didn’t see him as someone he should be cautious of.

There were rumors though. Some said they saw bruises on Minghao when changing clothes for PE, and people just assumed he got them from fights. More elaborated by sharing their accounts on seeing Minghao with their town’s gang of good-for-nothings. Wonwoo didn’t know if all those talks were true and didn’t bother to find out.

So he let Minghao lay down next to him, eyes closed and lips slightly curved up, exuding a feeling of ease as if the slightly damp soil under the tree was the world’s most comfortable place.

“This is a great spot,” Minghao said with eyes still closed.

Wonwoo agreed. It was at the back of the school complex, only separated from the woods with a fence. Being on top of a slanted land and having a quite abundant number of bushy trees, the spot was hidden from the inattentive eyes, but it had a great view of the field inside the school premise. Wonwoo had only found this place recently and had been coming here ever since. Although he didn’t even know why he liked this place until Minghao’s words earlier made him realize.

Wonwoo closed the book on his lap, no longer interested in pretending, not to Minghao nor himself. He gazed upon the field, eyes following the changes in the formation of the marching band players, while ears tuning in to the harmony of various instruments. Then he realized how much he wanted it.

The realization wasn’t accompanied with the warmth of hope. Only the cold acceptance that he would never obtain what he longed for.

The marching band continued practicing until it was dark and lights at the field were switched on. Wonwoo stayed. So did Minghao. They didn’t talk and Wonwoo experienced for the first time what’s it like to share a comfortable silence with someone else.

 

**

 

Wonwoo came again. Although, today he planned on not watching the practice until it’s finished. He wouldn’t skip another day at cram school and risk the school staff telling his mother about it. So he promised himself to get out of school after the band finished the first set of songs.

Xu Minghao came when the band got into the middle of a song. He saw Minghao pointing at the ground with his chin. Wonwoo nodded and let Minghao sat next to him.

Gaze back at the field, Wonwoo asked, “Hiding from Mr. Kang again?”

“No, I was looking for you.”

Wonwoo turned his head to see Minghao looking back with an air of seriousness, it made Wonwoo knew that Minghao meant his words. Wonwoo wondered what kind of business Xu Minghao could have with him.

“You know Kim Mingyu, right? I saw you talking with him a few times.”

Wonwoo didn’t know how to presume what Minghao would say, but he certainly didn’t expect this. Kim Mingyu was a fellow sophomore. Just like it’s the case with Minghao, there’s not a single person in this school who didn’t know Mingyu, though for entirely different reason. Kim Mingyu’s popularity was due to his constant position in the top of the school’s academic rankings and his good looks. He’s also secretary for students’ council and followed every school rules to the dot, so teachers treated him like some kind of idol. To Wonwoo he’s just a neighbor whom he sometimes have conversation with when Mingyu’s mother asked his son to deliver her cooking to next door, or when they both participated at some neighborhood event as expected for every member of the community.

“Yeah, I know him.”

“I need you to hook me up with him.”

Wonwoo blinked. The serious look on Minghao’s face didn’t disappear.

“Uh...”

“Look, I wouldn’t have asked you, but I’ve tried everything. He just kept running off as soon as I enter the room.”

“....why would he do that?”

Minghao shrugged. “Probably because I walked to him at the library, told him that I find him hot and let’s kiss--why are you giving me that look?”

“Have you had any conversation with him before that?”

“Not really. We’re not in the same class, nothing in common, and his friends always get in the way whenever I try to sit near him at the cafeteria.”

“So you decided you can go to him at the library and kiss him...”

“I’m a straightforward kinda guy.”

Wonwoo didn’t respond to that and asked instead.

"He rejected you, right? Shouldn't you leave it at that?"

Minghao scoffed and looked at Wonwoo like the latter was the silliest thing he'd ever seen.

"So? He might fall for me later. Besides, he did blushed when I cornered--ehm--approached him."

He ended with a smirk that made Wonwoo wanted to question how he could be so confident, but Wonwoo asked this instead.

“How do you think I can help you?”

“Invite me to your hangout session or something.”  


“We don’t really hang out, we’re just neighbors.”  


“Then you can get me to his home!”

“I don’t think that’s....”

Minghao rolled his eyes. “Or you can get me in some kind of study group with him.”

Wonwoo was surprised. He didn’t think Minghao would volunteer for a study group. He didn’t seem like the type who enjoyed studying (apparent from Minghao’s frequent absence from class and Mr. Kang’s complaints about his grades). Somehow this made Wonwoo thought that Minghao might be earnest.

“I’ll try.”

“THANK YOU.” Minghao grinned and then asked Wonwoo for his phone. His thumb moved with impressive speed as he entered and dialed his own number with Wonwoo’s phone. He returned the phone before he stood up and went off with a “let me know!” His steps were almost like hops.

As Wonwoo saved Minghao’s number in his contact, he realized it’s only the second time he had conversation with Minghao.

 

**

 

Wonwoo didn’t feel like talking, but he always replied to every questions his mother asked him from across the dining table. How’s your grades? Is the cram school enough to help you prepare for the upcoming exam? He didn’t want to upset her mother by refusing to answer, like what his younger brother did when their mother asked the same questions to him.

He could feel his brother tensing up next to him before starting a conversation with their father about a new trending game among his friends. Maybe his brother thought that their mother would forget to shove him with unwanted questions as she waited for her husband and son finish talking. It seemed to work. She had her dinner in quiet while Wonwoo joined in the conversation after his father asked him if the same game was trending in his school too.

After dinner they all sat in the living room, the TV showing an ongoing drama series. Mother had this impassive look but Wonwoo knew she always paid attention as she never failed to talk about the drama in the following day with the other mothers in their neighborhood. Father had a can of beer with him as usual, while his brother continued to fiddle with his phone and pretended he wasn’t interested.

Entered the long series of commercials, almost everything was familiar, including this one about laundry detergent that featured a high school marching band in it. Wonwoo had seen this commercial many times before, but somehow tonight it got stuck in his head, the memory replay button was hit again and again even after the drama was back on.

Wonwoo thought of his school’s marching band. He also thought of Minghao, how the latter was so open about his attraction towards Mingyu seemed to be determined to get close to Mingyu. The image of Minghao jumping over the fence came back to his mind. He wondered if he could jump like that too.

He quickly brushed the thought away.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I’m so excited to start another multichapter fic.


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Wonwoo took his first step.

 “I don’t mind, really, but I still don’t understand how you need my help in studying. You do perfectly well on your own,” said Mingyu as they walked upstairs.

“I just need to put in extra effort. Mother’s been telling me to improve my grades so that I can get into the best universities easily,” Wonwoo answered without really meaning it.

Mingyu leaned against Wonwoo, so closely that the rim of his glasses hit Wonwoo's temple, and whispered, “I like your mom but she’s so strict!”

Wonwoo just hummed. He thought Mingyu was equally strict, only to himself though. Mingyu’s mother even complained to Wonwoo on how her son studied too much.

Next to him, Mingyu looked at ease. They'd never been that close to hang out together; they had different group of friends, different interests. But they weren't awkward. At least Mingyu didn't look awkward when Wonwoo asked him to study together out of the blue, and not right now as they were headed to Wonwoo's room. Hand on the door knob, Wonwoo wondered if Mingyu would stay not awkward after entering his room.

The door clicked and Wonwoo heard a small thud followed with a muffled "f--ouch!" When the door opened completely, he saw Minghao sitting behind a low table, left leg bent so that the knee was near his face. Minghao quickly put the leg down and resumed a cross-legged position while giving them a strained smile.

Wonwoo was about to walk further into the room when he felt himself being pulled by the arm and taken out to the corridor. After he wasn't being dragged anymore, he turned his body to face Mingyu.

"Why is he here?" Mingyu hissed. The eyes behind those square-rimmed glasses looked shocked, more than Wonwoo had imagined.

"He said he's having trouble studying too, so I invited him," said Wonwoo casually, feigning innocence.

"What? Why does he care--How do you even know him?"

"...we go to same school."

”Yes, but--"

"Is there a problem?"

"I--"

For a while Mingyu opened and closed his mouth without letting out any sound. Maybe he's conflicted on whether to tell Wonwoo about the library incident. Wonwoo couldn't bring himself to feel guilty. Having a not-so-close relationship gave him that benefit.

Mingyu finally said something, it was a small no for Wonwoo's previous question. Then he obediently followed Wonwoo back into the room, albeit with stiff shoulders that tensed up even more when he plopped down on the cushion between Wonwoo and Minghao.

The study session started quietly. They decided to work on a set of questions first before discussing them. The peacefulness fell apart when Minghao only got one right out of ten and Mingyu tried to help him solve the other nine. It was a painful process to see.

"No, Minghao, you forgot the basic formula from earlier!"

Mingyu pointed to the notebook on the table angrily with his pen. He seemed to forget all his awkwardness. The gap between him and Minghao that he so adamantly kept during the beginning was gone as their shoulders were now touching. He was probably too occupied with his frustration towards Minghao that he had failed to notice.

"There are so many of them!"

Minghao also seemed to be consumed with frustration. He was all smiles earlier, humming as he worked on the questions while stealing glances at Mingyu. Yet now he was glaring at Mingyu like he so brazenly did toward Mr. Kang.

"Well yeah. You need them all to get through second year. And this one!! You don't apply it like that. Why don't you get it?"

"Maybe it's because you're such a bad teacher!"

Mingyu opened his mouth to retaliate, but for some reason he closed it again and turned to the notebook. His forehead creased and lips pulled into a tight line. Meanwhile Minghao glanced at Wonwoo, sending him some kind of message with his panicked eyes. Wonwoo had no idea on what to do in this kind of situation so he just shrugged.

Minghao's eyes bulged and he looked as if he's going to leaped over the table and pounce on Wonwoo, but then Mingyu spoke up.

''How about this?"

He tapped his pen at the notebook and Minghao scooted closer. Mingyu scribbled on the notebook as he explained how to solve the problems again, in a different way this time. Minghao started to understand better and looked more relaxed. Frustration also started to disappear from Mingyu's face. He stopped snapping when Minghao said he didn't get it, only furrowing his eyebrows while he asked which part Minghao didn't understand.

"That's it! You got it!" Mingyu's face lit up as he exclaimed. "I'll make you a few more questions to make sure you got it, okay?" He scrambled his pen on the notebook, glint on his eyes and smile on his lips.

Minghao stared at Mingyu for a while as if he was stunned. The muscles in his face visibly relaxed as he gazed at Mingyu, fondness overflowing from his eyes.

Wonwoo felt his own lips curving up.

 

**

 

“Wonwoo, you’re having lunch, right?”

The voice made Wonwoo’s heart skipped a beat. It always did. But only for a moment. When he lifted his face to see his classmate Jun, everything was back to normal.

Or so he convinced himself.

“Yeah.”

Jun responded with a smile before turning around and catching up with Seokmin and Hansol who were already at the door of the class. Wonwoo’s heart missed another beat again. It’s starting to get pretty tiring. Draining all the stamina he didn’t have.

At the cafeteria, Wonwoo sat next to Jun while Seokmin and Hansol were across them. They had lunch while chatting as usual, until Minghao walked from across the room, bag hanging from his shoulder, and took a seat next to Seokmin.

Minghao seemed oblivious to the surprised look from Wonwoo’s friends, or maybe he just decided to ignore it. He didn’t even bother to acknowledge them and immediately spoke to Wonwoo, eyes sparkling with excitement.

“When is the next study session?”

“I haven’t asked Mingyu yet, but he did mention having student council meeting on Wednesday. I’ll ask him if he’s available on Thursday.”

“Jeon Wonwoo—“ Minghao suddenly stood up from his seat—making Seokmin flinched and scooted closer to Hansol—then leaned over the table to shake Wonwoo’s shoulder. “I owe you big time,” he said with a grin.

Minghao went back to his seat with a satisfied smile while next to him, Seokmin was looking at Wonwoo with his eyes almost popping out from the sockets.

“Oh, right. Minghao, these are my classmates. Seokmin, Hansol, Jun. Guys, this is—“

“They know me. Kang sure have told them about his favorite student.”

“Right.” Wonwoo gave up on Minghao’s introduction and continued with his lunch. Hansol did too with jovial smile, while Seokmin seemed at edge. It’s like he couldn’t decide whether to pretend Minghao’s not sitting next to him or stare at Minghao. Seokmin looked scared yet intrigued at the same time.

Meanwhile Jun looked at Minghao with his ever gentle gaze. Wonwoo felt the urge to peek inside Jun’s head, he somehow wanted to know what Jun was thinking. Jun’s eyes were patient, as if waiting for Minghao to notice him. Eventually Minghao did.

“Is there anything?” Minghao said, eyes looking straight at Jun.

“Oh, I was wondering, since you’re here why don’t you have lunch too?” Jun said with a small smile, dimples attached.

Minghao just looked at him for a moment before saying “sure”. He stayed in his seat and grab his sling bag, producing a pack of bread from it.

“Why are you bringing your bag around?” asked Hansol, amusement obvious from his face.

Minghao bit on his bread and answered between his chews. “Gonna skip after this.”

Hansol’s eyes sparkled at his answer. “Do you have some kind of secret passage out of school?”

Minghao chuckled. “Maybe.” Hansol looked impressed while Minghao flaunted a smug. Wonwoo just shook his head.

Lunch with Minghao surprisingly went okay. Minghao didn’t talk much, but he responded when asked to. Then the topic became about when they’re going to watch the new action movie in the theater.

“Oh, come on, Jun. Just skip for once. You have marching band practice every day,” Seokmin whined.

“Not on weekends,” said Jun with pleading eyes.

“But movies are expensive on weekends!”

“I’m sorry... You guys just watch without me, please.”

“No!”

Seokmin swayed his body side to side like a child throwing tantrum. He hit the table in the process, making Jun’s opened water bottle toppled to the side and spilled its contents on Wonwoo’s lap.

Seokmin kept apologizing to him and Wonwoo had to tell him repeatedly that it’s fine. So Wonwoo didn’t notice until Jun already had a handkerchief in his hand and wiping Wonwoo’s trousers with it.

“Jun, it’s fine.” Wonwoo said quickly. But Jun insisted. He kept his head down and wiped his handkerchief over Wonwoo’s left thigh. Wonwoo felt as if someone just turned on the heater in the cafeteria.

Giving up on making Jun stop, he tried to look anywhere but Jun staring on his lap. His eyes caught Minghao’s and the latter gave him a smirk. Wonwoo sighed.

 

**

 

Wonwoo had arrived before the practice started. He settled in his usual place under the tree and just stared at the field. He heard footsteps coming towards him, just right before they were erased by the roaring sound of melodies from the field below.

“You won’t see Jun from here. Too far.”

Wonwoo didn’t bother to turn. He knew the teasing voice belonged to Minghao.

“I’m not looking for him.”

“Yeah, sure.” Minghao sounded amused, like he was just being tickled and liked it.

After that there was only the sound of brass and percussion. Wonwoo let himself get immersed in it, at times closing his eyes. Behind his closed eyes, the sight of the marching band formation he just saw mixed with the one in his memory.

His little brother managed to get their whole family to watch a high school baseball game at the stadium. It was packed with sweat and noise more than Wonwoo would usually like it, but he felt oddly comfortable. There’s this kind of feeling in the air, something that got his skin crawling. Weird yet highly addictive.

The time he felt it the most was during the break. One of the teams’ supporter took out their marching band to the field. He heard the first blow of the trumpet and in that exact moment, that something grew a hundred times more intense.

Just like that, Wonwoo went hopping around between what happened in the field and what occurred in his head, until the ending tune filled the air and Wonwoo completely came back to reality. He turned his head to his left. Minghao was still there, looking back at him with... nothing. No teasing, no question.  Neither judgement nor expectation. Wonwoo couldn’t remember the last time someone had looked at him like that.

“You really like the marching band.” Minghao said quietly. It wasn’t a question.

Wonwoo didn’t respond and so Minghao continued.

“Ever thought of joining?”

Wonwoo looked back at the field and said, “It’s no longer recruitment period. Mom wouldn’t approve anyway.”

He heard Minghao’s “I see”. Just like Minghao’s gaze, the voice was free from things like judgement. It made Wonwoo’s skin crawling. It was different from the sensation he felt when watching marching band. This one is burning, making him feel that he had to do something about it.

“Oh!”

Suddenly Minghao exclaimed, taking Wonwoo’s attention away from his thoughts.

“It’s time for Mingyu to finish the meeting!”

“And what are you going to do?”

“I’m going to walk home together with him.”

“...Did you ask him before about this?”

“Nope.”

“Okay...”

“Gotta go! See ya!” With that and one last grin, Minghao was gone. Wonwoo stayed for a while, mind going through all the questions in his head. When he left school and arrived at cram school later, he found that he didn’t answer a single one of them.

 

**

 

 

Just a few steps into the school gate, Wonwoo felt something hit his left arm. Thankfully he had good reflex; the hit made his body tilted to the side but failed to knock him to the ground.

It was Minghao, swaying his sling bag with a mischievous grin, looking jovial for someone who usually hated stepping foot into the school ground. Around them the other students did their best to look away despite the evident curiosity on their faces. Some walked by in fast pace, almost running. Probably thinking they would’ve gotten hit with the sling bag too if they had been too close.

Wonwoo and Minghao walked side by side towards the school building. On the way, Wonwoo saw Mingyu almost reaching the entrance door with two other male students. It seemed that Minghao noticed too as he let out a loud “Mingyu!” and waved enthusiastically.

Meanwhile Mingyu visibly jumped at his position. He only gave a short glance towards their direction before rushing his two friends, who looked surprised, inside the building.

Minghao didn’t stop waving even after Mingyu’s back was gone behind the wave of students going through the door, a fond smile on his face.

“You walked home with him yesterday?”

“Kinda.”

“Kinda.”

“We ran.”

“Huh?”

“He just ran when I approached him so I chased him.”

Wonwoo was surprised. Not because of what Minghao said, but because of how the words didn’t come as unexpected to Wonwoo.

“Okay.”

“Then he fell when we passed the riverbed. That clumsy giant.” Minghao chuckled. It made Wonwoo smile.

“He didn’t get up for a long time, I thought he passed out of something. Turns out he’s just tired from all the running and just decided to lie down.” Minghao shook his head. Then a smile graced his face as he said, “We ended up sitting there for, I don’t know, an hour maybe. Just, sit and talk a bit. Hah. He’s starting to get that there’s no use in resisting my charm.” The smile wasn’t his usual smug grin, it was somewhat bashful and there was notable blush on his cheeks.

“That’s good, Minghao.” Wonwoo meant it. He thought he’d never felt this glad, not even towards the things that happened to himself. He felt even better when Minghao turned to face him and showed his widest smile.

Wonwoo felt somewhat mesmerized and let out the first thing that came through his mind.

“You’re incredible.”

The words came out from his own mouth, yet Wonwoo felt strange. It was rare for him to just let out whatever went through his head.

Minghao had this look that made Wonwoo more convinced that he was being weird.

“What?”

“I mean it. You stand up for yourself and strive to get what you want.”

Even after they were out from his lips, the words stayed in his mind and consumed Wonwoo from the inside. They reminded him of everything he was not, sweeping him with a wave of frustration.

It seemed the words had affected Minghao more. He showed Wonwoo a face that Wonwoo had never seen before. It was somehow similar to Mother’s face when Wonwoo got a C for physics that one time in junior high school. Or maybe his brother’s when he kept failing on playing a piece with the piano and their mother wouldn’t let him stop practicing. Maybe both? Wonwoo wasn’t sure. But the look didn’t seem to be intended towards Wonwoo.

“I'm just a coward,” he said with a sad smile. Wonwoo was so stunned that it took him a while to realize the sadness that crept inside his own chest.

  

**

 

It was like a scene in one of those dramas his family watched every day, Wonwoo could almost hear the romantic BGM. At this moment, Wonwoo thought that he could finally understand how the protagonists in those dramas felt when they stared in awe at the other main lead.

From where he stood on his classroom door, he could see Jun sitting at the second row next to a series of windows that separated the room with the world outside. Jun had his face tilted towards the windows, head swaying to the sides as his lips moved to hum something Wonwoo couldn’t hear. He seemed absorbed in his own world, not even reacting when Wonwoo opened the door earlier.

The sight made Wonwoo recall the thought that had been bugging him these days. What was it with high school? He had been living quite the uneventful life and didn’t expect it to be any different when he entered high school. Now he was in his second year and look what’s happening: Getting interested in a club that involves a lot physical work. Hanging out with the school’s number one delinquent. Jun.

Then, just like in the dramas, the world moved in slow motion when Jun turned his face away from the window. With each agonizingly slow second, Wonwoo’s heart beat rapidly until it’s impossible to get any faster.

“Wonwoo.”

After pronouncing his name, those lips curved up into a smile. It might be Wonwoo’s favorite smile after—

 _Minghao_.

There’s a sinking feeling in his stomach as he thought of Minghao and his sad smile this morning.

“Wonwoo?”

Jun’s voice pulled him back to reality and he remembered what he was about to do. He walked to the seat in front of Jun’s, sitting down with his chest sticking to the back of the chair. His heart beat increased again, but now it’s for a different reason.

“Is the marching band still accepting application?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading and leaving kudos/comments! I was so happy to see the response for chapter 1. It’s only the beginning, but I’m glad you showed interest in this fic. I hope you also enjoyed this chapter.


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Wonwoo learned what to do when he jumped and hit the fence.

Wonwoo was spent. Now that he thought about it, he had never really done any physical activities aside from PE class. It was naïve of him to think he could pull off two hours of blowing trumpet while moving around from one side of the field to the other. More than once he thought his body would give up on him.

Yet he got through his first practice. The sound of his first play, his teammates’ casual support and understanding atmosphere, everything got him through. Coach was a bit strict, but that was to be expected.

He sat down on the grass, his trumpet tucked neatly inside the box next to him as Wonwoo was afraid to hurt it or make it dirty. From where he sat, he could see the slightly elevated land across the field, where his favorite spot belonged. To think that he used to be there, looking down here.

“Hey.”

Wonwoo turned his head to see Jun with his bright sparkling eyes. After plopping down on the spot next to him, Jun said, “I’m glad you joined our band. I didn’t know you were interested.” Like everything of Jun, the sparks in his eyes and the smile on his lips seemed genuine. Wonwoo didn’t know what to make out of it and his heart rate spiked up a bit.

“Thanks.” Jun smiled wider at his reply.

“So how’s practice?”

“It’s good. I’m a little short on stamina though.”

Jun nodded in understanding before his face lit up.

“Oh! How about we—“

Then, as sudden as he started, he abruptly stopped with a stutter. Wonwoo was going to ask him if he was okay, but Jun recovered quicker than expected.

“How about doing some running?” Jun said with smaller voice. His gaze kept going down even though he usually looked at Wonwoo straight in the eyes. “Building stamina by running regularly. I can accompany you. If you want to.”

The sight of Jun stuttering, the sound of his soft voice and the words he just said. All of them made Wonwoo felt like he was about to combust. He needed to calm down.

“No, it’s fine. You don’t have to go all the trouble,” he answered quickly, leaving a sinking feeling in his stomach. It got worse when he saw Jun looking disappointed. Or so he thought he did.

 

**

 

Wonwoo walked into the entrance of his house, closing the door and untying his shoes without really paying attention. His gaze was directed to the hall, but he wasn’t looking at anything. The memory of Jun from today’s practice still occupying his mind. All he could think was whether the disappointed look was just his imagination, and if it wasn’t, what did it mean.

Until he entered the living room and found his mother staring at him.

“Can you tell me why you’re cutting cram school to join a marching band?” Despite the evident anger lurking in her voice, she wasn’t shouting. Yet.

“He’s perfectly capable in maintaining his grades. He doesn’t need it.” His father said from the couch.

“What do you mean he doesn’t need it?? You don’t know that! Why bother with a school club anyway. It’s not going to be useful to get him into college!”

“He’s still in his second year. Let him enjoy school life a bit.”

His mother looked like she had lost hope towards his father. She turned to face Wonwoo again.

“Come here.”

Mother didn’t budge when father told her how Wonwoo just got home and to let him at least shower first. Wonwoo just sat on the couch, waiting for his parents to stop arguing. He kept waiting as his mother scolded him, and then when she finished with a firm “you’ll quit it tomorrow”, he felt his body becoming heavy, as if his own arms and legs were the heavy metals that chained him to the couch. So he stayed, even long after his parents left the room.

 

**

 

 

Beside him, Minghao was walking with his eyes on the notebook in his hands. More than once Wonwoo had to grab him by his shoulders to avoid collision with other students.

“You seem to like studying lately.”

At Wonwoo’s words, Minghao finally lifted his face from the notebook and looked at Wonwoo.

“Studying is still boring. And a pain in the ass. Though I don’t mind when it’s with Mingyu. He can give me pain in the ass, in other ways than teaching me to study.”

“Minghao!” Wonwoo flinched. The words evoked some images in his head that he would rather not see. Minghao’s hearty laugh eased his discomfort just a bit.

“You’re putting so much effort in this though. Can’t you just spend recess to take a break?”

“I want to cover this part before our next study session and in case you haven’t noticed, I’m really slow so I need the extra effort.”

“Then you should start attending your classes instead of skipping as usual. Studying properly in class might benefit you.”

“I can’t study with our boring teachers. I’d rather skip and get detention. I actually study better in detention. Plus it’s pissing Kang off, so more merit for me.” Wonwoo shook his head at Minghao’s stubbornness.

Wonwoo was still tilting his head over Minghao when the latter suddenly fell to the ground. Apparently Wonwoo was too caught up in conversation that he failed to be Minghao’s navigator. Now Minghao was sitting on his ass with pursed lips, which turned into a smirk as his eyes landed on the person in front of him.

“Hey, Mingyu,” he said with a deliberately sultry tone. His huge smirk still intact.

The student council’s secretary had a straight face, but Wonwoo saw how the eyes behind those glasses wavered. Not replying Minghao’s greeting, he bent his knees and picked up Minghao’s notebook from the ground.

“Are you going to stay like that?” he slapped the notebook to Minghao’s protruding knee. Minghao chuckled before pushing himself back up with one movement of his arms. Minghao had really strong arms and good balance, he didn’t even wobble and was back on his feet in no time.

Mingyu straightened his legs and looked at Minghao with an unamused face. Then he glanced at the open notebook in his hands, his eyes widened as a result.

“You bumped into me because you were studying?”

“You told me to master that chapter by this week.”

Mingyu raised his eyebrows. To be honest, Wonwoo used to share Mingyu’s skepticism towards Minghao’s ability in studying. But that was a long time ago for Wonwoo. He sensed that Mingyu actually believed in Minghao too, but like Minghao, he was also stubborn and kept throwing mocks at Minghao during their study sessions. It amused Wonwoo how Minghao and Mingyu looked happy as they bickered.

“Yeah, let’s see if you can do that,” Mingyu scoffed.

Minghao’s smirk became wider. “And I shall collect my prize then.”

Mingyu’s composure faltered at Minghao’s reply. He was visibly flustered. Even after he put his hand over his face to (supposedly) fix his glasses, his face still looked slightly flushed.

“I’ve never agreed to that.”

In their previous study session, Minghao demanded a kiss if he could answer all the questions correctly in Mingyu’s self-made mock exam at the end of this month. Mingyu had firmly refused. Minghao (as always) didn’t listen.

“You’re scared that I win.”

“There’s no way you can do it,” replied Mingyu. It occurred to Wonwoo that Mingyu might had said it on purpose. Minghao had shown multiple times that he did better when Mingyu told him he was incapable.

“Give me your hardest questions,” challenged Minghao. The confidence that exuded from his whole body convinced Wonwoo that Minghao could do anything if he wanted to. Hell, it even made Wonwoo feel that he could do the same.

“Mingyu?”

Another voice came from behind Mingyu. Three guys Wonwoo recognized as fellow sophomore students were looking at them with raised eyebrows. When Mingyu saw them, he practically shoved Minghao’s notebook to Minghao’s chest then left without even giving Minghao another glance.

“What man, you’re hanging out with him now?” Wonwoo heard one of the guys spoke as they walked away.

Mingyu’s awkward laugh came after. “Pfft. No. We just bumped into each other.”

“The dude’s stupid enough to bump into anything, huh.” The guy laughed and the other two joined him. Mingyu did too.

Wonwoo couldn’t see Mingyu’s face when he laughed, but he could see Minghao’s. And it broke Wonwoo’s heart.

 

**

 

He met Minghao again at the corridor after school. Wonwoo was in his sportswear and Minghao gave him a quick glance up and down.

“I thought you said no practice today.”

Wonwoo nodded. “I’m just going to do some running.” To Minghao’s raised eyebrows, Wonwoo continued, “I need to build my stamina.”

Minghao hummed and walked alongside Wonwoo. When they arrived at the field, Wonwoo did some basic stretching and started to run first. He was already halfway through the first round and was surprised to see Minghao catching up to him like it was nothing.

“You don’t have to,” Wonwoo said between his uneven breathing.

“I need this.” The small smile on Minghao’s face made Wonwoo’s chest squeezed a little more. “Besides, you need me. You’re doing terrible.”

Wonwoo certainly wasn’t used to running. He had Minghao taught him the proper breathing and posture, so at least he felt a little bit more comfortable. Minghao was patient, matching his slow pace and encouraging him.

He was planning on going for 3 rounds yet somehow he made it to 4, though now his feet was starting to give up on him. Minghao told him, “Past that corner and we’re done”. Wonwoo made it to that corner somehow. After the goal was behind them, they walked for another round to cool down.

His body unwound and the sweat that covered him didn’t feel that sticky anymore. Now sitting on the ground, Wonwoo thought of how the run made him feel good, not just from all the sweating. There’s this satisfying feeling that he never thought he’d get from running.

“Thanks, Hao.”

Sitting on his left, Minghao hummed without turning to face Wonwoo. Minghao kept his gaze in front of him, but Wonwoo wasn’t sure that Minghao was looking at anything in particular.

“Minghao.”

Minghao hummed again.

“Why do you like Mingyu?”

Minghao finally turned to face Wonwoo. He had his teasing smile on.

“He’s smart, cute, and also hot. Really hot,” he said playfully. Wonwoo squinted at him but he just laughed.

“But he hurts you.”

“Nah,” Minghao shrugged before rubbing his chin with his left hand. “I might be a masochist anyway. You know, I won’t mind trying that kind of play with—oh, come on, you prude.”

Wonwoo didn’t stop frowning. Minghao looked at him with glee before dropping the playful look from his face. The nonchalant vibe slowly disappeared. All that’s left were a small smile and a pair of pensive eyes.

“We’ve talked before. Once, when we were freshmen.” Affection made way to Minghao’s eyes. “I guess he wasn’t as smart as he is now. The others were quick to see that I’m bad news while he flopped down next to me at the cafeteria.” He stopped for a chuckle. “We didn’t talk much, just random stuffs, and didn’t talk again for the whole year, nothing in common, right? But...”

When Minghao stopped, he had this look. Inexplicable and somehow sad, but also very beautiful.

“Sure you’ve seen it yourself. How he helps others in council and other situations. He’s a good kid.”

“He’s not always good.” Mingyu did tried to ignore Minghao’s existence in front of everyone, as if associating himself with Minghao would harm him somehow. His reputation maybe? Wonwoo didn’t know. Why would that matter when the fact remained; Mingyu hurt Minghao.

Yet the affection never left Minghao’s eyes. Even though his smile was sad, his eyes didn’t change.

Wonwoo sighed and leaned back, letting gravity pulled him to the ground. He stayed like that, enjoying the way the grass tickled his skin as he basked in silence. It felt like an hour had passed when he opened his mouth again.

“My mom told me to quit the band.”

“Are you quitting?”

Wonwoo spent a few moments glancing at Minghao from the ground. When he finally opened his mouth, he said, “You won’t stop pursuing Mingyu.” He didn’t ask because he knew the answer.

“Nope.” Minghao returned his glance from above. “You won’t quit the band.” It wasn’t a question either.

“Nope.”

At that moment, Wonwoo felt himself breaking into a grin without even intending to do so. Minghao was grinning too.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading another chapter! <3  
> How was this one?   
> I hope you can tell me what you think. Your comments always brighten my day, and I mean every comment, from "let me squeaaaaal" comments to criticism. I hope you won't hesitate to tell me if there's anything you found weird or could be done better.
> 
> We're almost halfway to the end! I hope you're as excited as I am XD


	4. Chapter 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Wonwoo still couldn’t jump, so he tried to climb instead.

Mingyu only stared at the paper in front of him. He didn’t even try to fix his glasses which slid down to the tip of his nose. Next to him, Minghao was wiggling his upper body in some sort of victory dance, a huge grin on his face.

“I can’t believe it...” The words left Mingyu’s lips almost like a whisper, but Wonwoo could still hear them from across the table.

“Ha!” Minghao let out a victorious yell and Mingyu turned to face the excited boy, disbelief written on his face. When Minghao stopped the hype and gazed at Mingyu, the latter visibly gulped.

“Now where’s my prize?” said Minghao, eyes looking straight at Mingyu’s. Mingyu’s eyes wavered but didn’t leave Minghao’s gaze.

“I don’t remember saying yes to that.”

“Aw, come on. Don’t I deserve something for all my hard work?”

“What about _my_ hard work? I’m the one who’s been teaching you.”

“Exactly. It’s also a prize for you. Win-win.”

Mingyu gasped exaggeratingly at Minghao’s statement. He seemed ready to throw any witty remarks he could come up with, but was rendered speechless when Minghao leaned towards him, moving closer so that Mingyu had to drag his lower body backward to keep the gap between them. He ended up falling onto his back, Minghao hovering above him. Mingyu looked like he was this close to turn into a puddle.

“Ehem.”

Wonwoo cleared his throat and both turned their heads towards him. Mingyu looked like a ripe tomato while Minghao didn’t seem fazed at all. The latter still had that smug grin on his face even as he left Mingyu and went back sitting cross-legged. Wonwoo wanted to sympathize with Mingyu for having to deal with Minghao’s... aggressive way of showing affection, but to be honest, Wonwoo couldn’t bring himself to do that because Minghao seemed happy and somehow that was all that mattered.

“About our next session, I’m sorry but I have to cancel. The band’s having an extra practice.”

“What?” Minghao looked disappointed now and Wonwoo felt guilty. He tried to think of something to make it up, but Mingyu beat him first.

“Okay. We’ll do it with just the two of us.”

Wonwoo raised his eyebrows slightly. He didn’t except Mingyu to say that. It seemed neither did Minghao, who didn’t even try to hide his surprise with his widened eyes and mouth slightly gaping.

“What?” There’s a dust of pink on Mingyu’s cheeks. Wonwoo didn’t know if it’s from the previous or the current situation. “After only acing a _practice_ test, you think you’re good enough to skip studying now?”

“No! I’m still a bad, bad student. Teach me!” Minghao said eagerly. His smile was bright and free of the previous smug, it was almost childlike. Mingyu looked like he was in awe and Wonwoo felt finally he could sympathize with him. Minghao’s smile was indeed beautiful.

 

**

 

The bottle of water came inside his field of vision slowly. Wonwoo stared at it for a moment before looking up, tracing the hand that gripped the bottle, up to Jun’s face.

“Thanks,” said Wonwoo as he took the bottle. He opened the cap and took a gulp while Jun moved to sit on his right.

“You seem to get used to practice better than before,” he heard Jun said.

“Yeah.” Wonwoo replied as he closed the bottle. He kept his gaze forward as he continued. “It’s thanks to you.”

“Me?”

Wonwoo thought against turning his head. They were sitting fairly close together, shoulders almost touching. He didn’t think he’d survive seeing the other’s face in such close proximity. Yet at the same time he wanted to. The times Wonwoo felt suffocated when looking at Jun was equal to those when he wanted to keep gazing forever.

When he did turned his head, he was greeted with pure puzzlement on Jun’s face.

“You suggested me to run. I’m doing it and it does wonders.”

He saw the confusion turned into delight as Jun’s lips curved up. He shouldn’t have turned his head after all.

“I’m glad.”

No one said anything after that. They kept their gaze at each other in silence. Wonwoo’s head was screaming at him to turn away before he did anything stupid, but he was paralyzed. Thankfully, Jun broke the eye contact first.

“Uhm. It’s great you can do it routinely.” Jun said after letting his eyes wander, still looking at Wonwoo but not straight in the eyes. Wonwoo noticed a hint of red on Jun’s cheeks, but as everything concerning Jun, Wonwoo was never sure if it really happened or just his imagination.

“I had a hard time starting. That’s why I asked my brother to accompany me.”

“Yeah. I got Minghao running with me.”

“Oh.”

He didn’t miss how the edges of Jun’s smile shook ever so slightly. Wonwoo felt like he needed to say something, but his head somehow chose this moment to stop thinking.

“I, uhm—“ Jun was about to speak when someone called his name. It was Seungcheol from percussion. The senior waved enthusiastically towards their direction, his body swaying along with his right arm.

“Oh, I think he’s calling me. See you later.” Jun left him one last smile before standing up and walking towards Seungcheol.

For a while Wonwoo stayed sitting on the ground. He couldn’t hear what Jun and Seungcheol were talking about, but he could see Jun bright face as he opened his mouth in laughter. A mix of sensations attacked Wonwoo at the same time; a sense of aching to hear how that laugh sounded like, a burning feeling in his chest upon the fact that Seungcheol was the one who induced that laugh, a heavy weight in his stomach when he reminded himself that he was still sitting here and did nothing.

After a while, Seungcheol and Jun stopped chatting to go back to the field for the last practice session of the day. Wonwoo stood up and joined. By the end of the practice, Wonwoo came into one conclusion.

He was not sure about many things, but there’s one thing he was certain of.

  
**

 

The head of their class announced that he was summoned to the teacher’s lounge and needed a few people to deliver stuffs to the students’ council in his stead. A box of papers full of details of what their class was planning to do for their seniors’ farewell night, which was still quite some time in the future, but it was a huge deal in this school so preparation in advance was necessary. Nobody raised their hands immediately. They all knew.

As expected, Jun stepped up for the job. He said nothing, just stood up and walked straight to the box at the teacher’s podium. The leader gave him an appreciative smile and Jun replied with his own.

“There’s one more box. The property sample that the council need to approve. Anyone?”

Wonwoo raised his right hand, maybe a bit too quickly, he felt like he almost strained his arm. Worth it. He needed this chance.

“Thanks, Wonwoo.”

With that, their leader left the class and the others started to pack their things. Wonwoo left his stuffs untouched and walked towards the front of the class. Jun was waiting with that soothing smile of his.

They chatted all the way to the students’ council room. Wonwoo enjoyed the talk but he couldn’t help feeling distracted. He was constantly thinking of the perfect timing, which part of the conversation that he could use to say what he wanted to convey.

They reached one of the doors to the council room while they were having a discussion about Hansol’s sandwich story (as with most of Hansol’s stories, this one was weird). Wonwoo was about to say his opinion when he noticed something from the slightly opened door.

Mingyu was inside. That was nothing worth noting. After all, Mingyu was the secretary of the council. The unusual part was Minghao standing next to him.

Mingyu had his lips pursed in annoyance towards Minghao, but if the study sessions had thought Wonwoo something, it was that Mingyu’s was never really annoyed when it came to Minghao. At Mingyu’s pursed lips, Minghao said something which ended in a smirk. Mingyu moved his lips furiously in response, while Minghao opened his mouth wide, sound of laughter reaching Wonwoo’s ears through the gap of the door.

When Minghao stopped laughing, he went back to his teasing smirk and leaned closer to Mingyu. On the other hand Mingyu kept moving his lips, probably spitting words of argument. He finally stopped when Minghao took another step closer, there was barely any distance between their faces.

Wonwoo wasn’t sure who moved forward first. Maybe they did it at the same time. The gap was gone so quickly.

There was a part of Wonwoo that told him to take a step back and turn around, to give his friend and neighbor their rights to privacy. But there was something fascinating in watching their lips entangled, pressed together so hard it looked like they were trying to mold them into each other. At times they separated only to reunite a split second after.

When they finally separated for good, Mingyu stumbled backwards and his bottom hit a table behind him. Minghao laughed and Mingyu threw (99% sure) words of argument again, forehead scrunched and all, but there was no denying the blush on his cheeks. Minghao said something and smiled before leaving Mingyu, walking out from the door at the other side of the room. Wonwoo and Jun didn’t go in until Mingyu looked like he had regain his composure.

The way back to class felt different. They were still chatting, but the conversation was no longer as smooth. At some point the conversation was cut off, leaving a strange silence between them. Wonwoo was contemplating on what to say when Jun spoke up first.

“I’m sorry.”

It puzzled Wonwoo. “For what?”

“Well, uhm...” Wonwoo glanced at Jun, who bit his lips before replying Wonwoo’s gaze with his own. It was veiled with something... disappointment? Once again Wonwoo felt unsure. But just as always, there was sincerity deep in those eyes.

“Mingyu and Minghao... I thought you’d be sad. I mean, you and Minghao...”

Oh.

“Minghao’s a friend.” Wonwoo replied.

“I see.” Jun’s response was short and sounded unconvinced. He no longer looked at Wonwoo and returned his gaze to the front. Even from the side, Wonwoo could see Jun’s eyes running around everywhere but to his left, to Wonwoo’s direction. His lips were pulled back, as if he was holding back _something_.

Wonwoo spent some time examining his side profile, thinking whether Jun’s reaction was _the sign_. Or maybe he interpreted it the wrong way. Wonwoo decided it didn’t matter. He had made his resolve so he would say it no matter what.

“I have someone else I like.” His own voice sounded unexpectedly calm. He thought it would come out as messy judging from how nervous he was. “I like Minghao but not that way. I mean, romantically.”

The gradual raise in his heart rate was starting to affect him, but he pushed it aside and squeezed the words out. “There’s someone else.”

It took Wonwoo two steps to realize that Jun had stopped on his tracks.

Turning back, Wonwoo saw Jun looking at him. During the time he knew Jun, there were times Wonwoo wanted to always have Jun’s eyes gazing at him, and those when he wanted to run away. This time it was the latter. But Wonwoo persisted. Despite all of the uncertainty, he was sure that if he ran away, he’d forever regret it.

He recalled Minghao that day and tried to imagine himself as his friend, feeling the wind caressing him, his foot pushing the boxes, legs stretched as he tried to get his body forward and over the fence.

Wonwoo wanted to jump. So he kept his gaze at Jun and opened his mouth. Unfortunately, a set of familiar voices called their names before Wonwoo could say anything to Jun. It was from Seokmin and Hansol who appeared from behind the corner of the corridor.

As the four of them walked the corridor together, Wonwoo stole a glance at Jun. At the side profile he adored, Wonwoo made a promise inside his heart to try taking another leap next time.

 

**

 

The next day, Wonwoo was walking the corridor with Minghao when Mingyu and his friends came from the other end. Mingyu’s body jolted and his eyes went all over the place. Meanwhile on Wonwoo’s left, Minghao was unfazed; he didn’t move his gaze somewhere else, but didn’t show that he recognized Mingyu in any way. He kept his lazy stride and just walked past, turning right towards the entrance. Wonwoo thought it was weird but said nothing.

He only spoke up when the school was far behind them, the street filled with students of different uniforms, mothers and their shopping bags, sweaty office workers walking briskly with briefcase in one hand and handkerchief in the other.

“I thought you and Mingyu were dating.” It was not a good way to go into the topic, but Wonwoo wasn’t exactly good with making small talk.

“What makes you think so?” Minghao’s tone wasn’t any different from usual.

“I saw you two in the council room yesterday.”

“Ah...” Wonwoo saw Minghao grinning from the corner of his eyes. “He was just, _finally,_ giving me my reward for the mock exam.” Minghao kept his grin but Wonwoo didn’t feel reassured.

“You’re giving up?” Wonwoo had a mixed feeling about this. A part of him felt disappointed if Minghao did. At the same time, he also wanted it. He didn’t think being with someone who wouldn’t even acknowledge Minghao in public could make Minghao happy.

To answer Wonwoo’s dilemma, Minghao said, “I’m giving space.”

Wonwoo thought about Minghao’s words. He didn’t know what to make of them. He continued to ponder until he felt Minghao’s finger on his forehead, rubbing the creases he didn’t know existed.

“I told you,” said Minghao with a grin. “He’ll give in to my charms eventually.”

“Right.” To that, Minghao placed both of his hands on Wonwoo’s left arm and pushed him to the side. Wonwoo staggered a bit but regained his posture in no time, chuckling in the process.

“Stop thinking about _my_ love life and mind yours.” Minghao let out an exaggerated sigh. “How’s Jun?”

Wonwoo didn’t know where to start.

“He saw you guys too. We went to the council room together.”

Minghao hummed as the information intrigued him in some way. “How did he react?”

“He said he thought I’d be bummed. He thought I like you. Like, _like_ you.”

“You don’t?” Minghao gasped in an exaggerated way. Wonwoo only sighed and Minghao laughed at that.

“What did you say to him?”

“I....” Wonwoo recalled Jun’s gaze from that time and noticed that his cheeks felt warmer. “I told him I have someone else I like.”

“And?”

“That’s it.”

“That’s it?”

Wonwoo heard Minghao put his feet down rather noisily and stopped behind him. Before he could even turn around, Minghao hit him on the butt with his bag.

Rubbing his bottom with his left hand, Wonwoo finally turned around and swung his own bag towards Minghao. With enviable reflex, Minghao tilted his body so that the bag went past his left side.

“Tsk.”

When Wonwoo smacked his lips, Minghao’s grin turned into a smirk. He raised his bag upwards then charged towards Wonwoo.

Wonwoo started to run, Minghao following dangerously close behind him. Between the feeling of his muscles working and his fairly stable breathing, Wonwoo thought of how all the running and band practice had improved his stamina. He also thought of how he used to overthink about happiness when it’s actually a simple thing. Just like this moment.


	5. Chapter 5

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Wonwoo finally went over the fence. Yet he couldn’t be happy because Minghao fell.

Wonwoo took in the sight before him and compared it to a few months ago. There was no longer a gap between Minghao and Mingyu; their shoulders literally touched as they had their heads bent over the table.

Minghao never talked to Mingyu at school anymore. No chasing after him or trying to walk home together. As if to compensate that, Minghao went all out during their study sessions. He would sit closer to Mingyu, try to make conversation, tease Mingyu most of the time. During those times, Minghao had his best smile.

Mingyu didn’t try to dismiss Minghao. At Wonwoo’s room, Mingyu was less “perfect student Mingyu” and more relaxed. He didn’t budge when Minghao moved closer to him and responded to each of Minghao’s teasing with his best effort. Most of the time he lost, the last witty remark went to Minghao. Yet after pouting at his lost, Mingyu would always smile. More than once Wonwoo caught him staring at Minghao when Minghao was too busy scribbling on his notebook. It made Wonwoo believed that human’s eyes could sparkle.

Wonwoo didn’t know if it’s for the best, but at least in this room, Mingyu made Minghao smile.

Inside his head, he often replaced Mingyu and Minghao with Jun and himself, how they would sit so close to each other like Mingyu and Minghao did, sharing the same hearty laugh and calming atmosphere. Every time Wonwoo found himself doing this, he felt his cheeks burning hot.

 

**

 

Wonwoo went downstairs to send Mingyu and Minghao off. He saw his mother in the living room, still in her working suit. Mingyu and Minghao greeted her and she replied with a smile. Wonwoo thought she must’ve had a good day.

Yet after his friends were out of the door and Wonwoo was back in the living room, his mother’s face turned impossibly sour.

“Wonwoo, we need to talk.” Her tone was calm but stern.

Heart beating slightly faster, Wonwoo nodded and sat on the couch. He scooted to edge so that there’s space for his mother. She didn’t take the seat but kept standing in front of the couch with a frown and a hand on her hips. Wonwoo didn’t like this. He knew what his mother was angry about. It was about time that she found out.

“Why are you reducing your time in cram school?” Her voice was shaking now, probably from holding back anger.

“I need the time to practice marching band.” Wonwoo replied honestly. There’s no use in lying.

His mother shut her eyes hard. The lids stayed closed for a while and when she opened them, Wonwoo wanted to sink into the couch.

“I’ve told you to quit, didn’t I? Why are you—How did you even get the cram school to—Your father. He did this. He’s never done anything right in raising you kids, always spoiling. When he gets home....”

She stopped to look Wonwoo in the eyes once again.

“You’ll go to school tomorrow and quit the band.” Her tone was firm.

Wonwoo was always afraid of her voice. It didn’t bring many good memories for him. Mostly speaking in raised tone. That’s why he used to obey anything she said. He was terrified of what would happen if he went against it.

Now he’s still scared, but he no longer want to let his fear take over.

“No.”

His mother looked stupefied, it was like she was turning into a statue for a moment.

“What?”

“I’m not quitting the band, Mom.”

He saw how his mother’s lips trembled. He was prepared for what’s coming.

“Listen, Wonwoo. The band isn’t going to help you get into university!” Her chest was heaving up and down. She looked slightly out of breath as she spitted out the words. “It’s a waste of time! Don’t you get it? I’m trying to tell you what’s best for you. Is it so hard to just follow it?” She was almost screaming, Wonwoo wondered if the neighbors could hear her.

All his life Wonwoo had been following his mother’s words to avoid this. He hated this version of Mom, so he always shut his mouth, listened, and did what he was told to. But recently he’d been thinking. Did he want this for the rest of his life?

Mother stopped talking. She looked at Wonwoo, her eyes demanding a response.

“If I fall out of the top 20% in school this semester, I’ll quit the band,” he simply said. His heart was beating erratically against his rib cage, yet his voice sounded calm and sure.

His mother opened her mouth but said nothing. She spent a few moments just gaping at Wonwoo. When she finally said something, her voice no longer bore anger. She just sounded tired and Wonwoo couldn’t bring himself to hate her anymore.

“I’ll hold on to that.”

She left him in the room without another glance, and he finally let himself sink into the couch. Only then he realized that his body had been so tense, it took time for him until the softness of the cushion travelled to his skin. As his numb senses started to come back, he felt how his lips were slightly curved up.

 

**

Hansol and Seokmin were summoned by their homeroom teacher so they left the class while grumbling what could’ve been so important that they had to spare time from their precious lunch break. They told Wonwoo and Jun to have lunch without them. As much as Wonwoo liked Hansol and Seokmin, he cheered loudly inside his head.

“You bring lunchbox today?” asked Wonwoo.

Jun’s shoulder jolted before he turned to face Wonwoo. “Yes,” he answered.

“I want to eat somewhere else today. Would you go with me?”

Jun looked confused but nodded anyway. Wonwoo led him outside of the school building, to the part of the school ground that’s higher than the rest, behind the thick trees near the field; his special spot. He plopped down under the tree and Jun followed. At first Jun took Minghao’s usual spot on his left, but as always, the ground’s a bit damp. Jun immediately lifted himself and moved, closer to Wonwoo. He seemed surprised when realizing that their shoulders were almost touching. Wonwoo was nervous but didn’t move away. He was relieved that Jun stayed too.

They opened their own lunchboxes and had their lunch. They had never had any difficulty in making conversation, but this time Wonwoo put in some extra effort, trying to talk more with Jun, even telling some jokes to get him to laugh more (Minghao said his jokes were lame but they made Jun laugh anyway so Wonwoo decided to not care about Minghao’s evaluation).

When their lunchboxes were empty, Jun said, “I’m glad.”

Wonwoo twisted his neck and Jun gave him a shy smile. “I’m just glad to talk. To know more about you. Sorry, I’m being weird,” he ended with an awkward laugh.

Wonwoo wanted to say something to that, but his head was a mess. Thoughts jumbled up, like how Jun looked so cute right now, how his own heart rate was spiking up dangerously and he needed to stop it, whether to say “it’s fine”, or “I’m glad too” or something else. He couldn’t come up with a response so he just smiled.

A moment of silence came and the one who broke it was Jun.

“Oh, I just realized. We can see the field from here.”

Wonwoo casted his gaze on the field. “Yeah. That’s why I like it here.”

He saw Jun smiled from the corner of his eyes. “It’s like your own secret space,” he said with amusement in his voice.

“Yep.”

“It’s very well-hidden too. I wonder if the teachers even know about this place.”

“I don’t think so. Minghao always hide here and they never know.”

“Oh.”

Suddenly excitement was gone from Jun’s voice. When Wonwoo turned to see him, he had _that look_ again. There were creases between his eyebrows and the edges of his lips seemed to be strained, like they’re trying hard to keep the smile from faltering. Wonwoo used to agonize over how he should interpret this look of Jun, how he should respond to it, kept thinking whether it would be the right response and ended up not doing anything. But now all he could think of was how uncomfortable Jun seemed and he wanted to make him at ease.

“Have you been to that new fried cutlet shop downtown?”

The discomfort from Jun’s face made way to a look of surprise at Wonwoo’s sudden and unrelated question.

“No.”

“You want to try it this Sunday?”

“Sure. Seokmin’s been there but I think he’ll say yes.”

“No.”

“Hmm?”

Once again the confused look was back on Jun’s face. Wonwoo thought of how endearing he looked, it was making him warm all over. Really, Jun could make him feel so many different things in just a couple of minutes.

“Not with Seokmin, or Hansol. Just you and me. If you’re okay.”

The way pink crept on Jun’s face so quickly was stunning. Looking at that, Wonwoo felt his own face warming up and he desperately hoped that he didn’t look as flushed as Jun.

“Okay.” Jun nodded once, and twice, and when he’s about to nod for third time, he laughed, not completely free from awkwardness, but sincere and hearty.

Wonwoo felt like he had finally made the jump.

 

**

 

Wonwoo wanted to tell Minghao, but the rest of the day went unexpectedly busy. He could always text, but Wonwoo felt like telling him in person. So he waited until Tuesday, but Minghao was nowhere to be seen. When he went to Minghao’s class after the last bell rang, Minghao’s classmate told him that Minghao didn’t show up at class at all. It was usual for him to skip one or two classes even now (especially Mr. Kang’s class), but to skip for the entire day was unheard of. Wonwoo texted him before going to band practice. Even when the practice was over and he’s already at home, there was no reply. Wonwoo went to sleep feeling uneasy that night.

Minghao still didn’t show up at school on Wednesday. Not replying Wonwoo’s text either. Worry grew more in Wonwoo’s chest, but he decided to wait. Maybe tomorrow Minghao would show up. They’re having study session after school on Thursday. Minghao wouldn’t miss it for the world.

Wonwoo was right. Minghao did show up on Thursday. What Wonwoo didn’t expect was to see him with left eye covered in bandage, a trail of bruises that peeked out from under the short sleeve of his right arm. He suspected there were more bruises hidden. Minghao was walking very slowly, careful not to let his body come into contact with anything and especially attentive with how he lifted his legs.

They didn’t even had the chance to talk. Minghao was approached by the teachers as soon as he entered the school gate and was brought to the teacher’s office.

It didn’t take long before everyone knew. Some said Minghao’s been to another fight, this time with more opponents. That’s why he was bruised all over. Those who eavesdropped at the teacher’s lounge said that the teachers asked Minghao about the fighting rumors. He didn’t deny them.

Wonwoo had never talked to Minghao about the rumors before. He didn’t know if they were true. Frankly, he didn’t care. But now he wished he did. Maybe if he had asked Minghao, tried to know him better, he could’ve prevented Minghao getting all battered and suspended from school for 2 weeks.

Wonwoo tried to find Minghao at lunch break, but he was already sent home. So he sent a text, asking if they could meet and talk. No reply came.


	6. Chapter 6

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Wonwoo and Minghao learned how to lean on others.

After all this time knowing Minghao, it was Wonwoo’s first time going to Minghao’s house. Wonwoo never felt like he wanted to visit; they could always hang out at school or Wonwoo’s place. Minghao never invited him either. He had to ask Minghao’s homeroom teacher for the address, using an excuse that he wanted to give Minghao copies of the week’s lessons and assignments so that Minghao could study at home. No one else had volunteered for that so the teacher let him.

Minghao’s home turned out to be a small apartment building with only two floors and probably not more than 10 rooms each. The building seemed to be well-maintained despite the slightly faded cream-colored paint. At least the stairs didn’t look like they’re going to break any moment.

Wonwoo went to the second floor, the fourth door from the stairs. He heard the sound of TV from inside, which abruptly stopped when he knocked on the door. Wonwoo sighed. Minghao should’ve let the TV on if he didn’t want to get caught.

Wonwoo knocked once again and was greeted by silence. He didn’t bother to knock for the third time.

“I know you’re there. I’m not going home until you open the door.”

He stood by his words and stayed until the sky turned dark. Missed cram school, but he used the time to study on his own, standing up with his back leaning on the tiny space between Minghao’s room and the next room’s window. Skipping a day wouldn’t matter as long as his mother didn’t know and he kept his grades.

It was almost 8 when Wonwoo heard steps coming up the stairs. He looked up from his book and saw a woman with short ponytail. She walked towards Wonwoo, no towards the door next to Wonwoo, and looked at him with a confused expression. Her bloodshot eyes looked tired under the dim light, the wrinkles and creases filling her face added the nuance of an overworked middle-aged woman.

“Who are you?” she asked with a hoarse voice.

“Hello, Mrs. Xu. I’m Wonwoo, Minghao’s school friend. I’m visiting to give him copies of class materials.”

The woman nodded at Wonwoo’s explanation and proceeded to open the door. She left it open but didn’t gesture Wonwoo to come in, so Wonwoo waited by the door.

“Minghao! Your friend’s here!” she yelled from the small entrance. Hasty footsteps followed and soon Minghao was standing on the entrance. He still had his left eye covered in bandage.

“Mom, I’m going out for a sec.”

Minghao’s mother replied with a grunt and went inside. Meanwhile, Minghao took a pair of shoes and quickly put them on. As soon as he finished, he grabbed Wonwoo’s arm, closed the door, and dragged him downstairs.

Minghao didn’t only dragged him, he was also dragging himself. Wonwoo could see he was still having trouble walking. Yet Minghao wouldn’t slow down. Only when they got close to a park that his steps came to a halt with hunched shoulders. It gave a sense of fatigue to him, similar to the vibe his mother had. He let go of Wonwoo’s arm and approached a hippopotamus-shaped statue. He got on his fine leg and swung his bad one over the hippo to sit on top of it. The statue was low enough so that he didn’t have to lift his legs that high. Wonwoo got on the zebra beside him.

“Were you going to camp in front of my house all night if my mother didn’t come?” said Minghao with forehead scrunched, clearly annoyed. Somehow it brought glee to Wonwoo, like he’s found something fun to tease. Of course, Minghao was mad and he shouldn’t make fun of it. But it was refreshing to see Minghao getting irritated with him.

“Sure.”

“You’re crazy.”

“Says the guy who once jumped over the school fence and injured his leg.”

“Hmph.”

MInghao went silent after that and Wonwoo hesitated. He wanted to ask so many questions, to know what’s wrong and do something about it, to make up for all the time when he didn’t try to get to know Minghao better. But he had a feeling that it wasn’t the right time. Maybe someday, when Minghao pulled down this invisible barrier he put up and went out by himself.

So instead, Wonwoo said something he thought he had never expressed before, or maybe had not said enough.

“Thanks, Minghao.”

He sensed a gaze on him and turned to see Minghao facing him, staring with question marks all over his face.

“For, you know, things,” Wonwoo continued. The confused look was gone from Minghao’s face. This time Wonwoo couldn’t read his expression.

Wonwoo opened his bag and took out the materials he was supposed to deliver and placed them on Minghao’s lap. “Text me if there’s anything you don’t understand. I can come again and we’ll do study session at your place.” he suggested.

Minghao answered with a small “Sure”.

After nodding at Minghao’s answer, Wonwoo lifted himself off from the zebra and said, “See you later then.”

He smiled and saw Minghao responding with his own smile. But Minghao’s was strained, the edges of his lips barely lifted. And his eyes. Blank, like he was tired of everything and erased any emotions from those orbs. They haunted Wonwoo’s thoughts that night, making him imagine terrible things, evoking regret for not addressing Minghao’s situation. That night Wonwoo had a restless sleep.

 

**

 

Wonwoo didn’t usually go downtown on Sundays. He preferred spending time at home, reading or playing games with his brother. But today he went out in his (hopefully) best clothes for the occasion. He really took his time to choose them. At first he thought that he shouldn’t have think too much and just picked the ones at the top of the pile. After all, it’s not his first time going out with Jun, but a part of his brain told him that this was different; there wouldn’t be Hansol or Seokmin, and he was nervous. Putting his energy into choosing clothes was a good way to distract himself from the nervousness.

They agreed to meet at a fountain across the train station. Wonwoo came 5 minutes earlier and didn’t have to wait long until Jun walked towards him with a smile. Wonwoo felt his own lips curving up instantly.

“Hungry?” asked Wonwoo. It was almost noon.

“Starving.” Jun’s smile widened.

They went to the fried cutlet shop first. Sitting across each other, they enjoyed the same pork cutlet menu. Jun put a little bit of mayonnaise on the edge of his cutlet, it reminded Wonwoo on how Minghao did the same with his cutlet set at the school cafeteria. At first the thought made him smile, but then Minghao’s eyes from that night came across his mind, and Wonwoo felt an invisible hand squeezing his chest, engulfing him in a surge of anxiety.

He belatedly realized that he was spacing out. When he snapped out of his thoughts, he saw Jun looking at him with slight concern and calling his name. Jun told him that he got sauce on the right edge of his lips. He took some tissue and wiped it, but Jun said he missed some. He froze as Jun leaned forward, taking the tissue from his hand and wiped it for him. It seemed that he spaced out again. Only when Jun was back on his seat, looking slightly stiff and flustered, Wonwoo noticed how his heart was beating like he just did 5 laps of running around the field.

After lunch they went strolling the shopping district. Walking in and out some stores, chatting about amazingly realistic-looking frog-shaped chocolates and cool robot toys. When they got into a hobby shop, he saw a skateboard and thought of when Minghao said he wanted to try riding one. Wonwoo was sure that Minghao would master it easily with his exceptional physical abilities. But then Wonwoo remembered how Minghao dragged his legs the other day. It brought uneasiness to his chest and he couldn’t smile sincerely at Jun’s adorable burst of excitement at the sight of actual size Labrador doll.

The sky was tinted with orange when Wonwoo and Jun left the shopping area. Jun had a small bag of very spicy and crispy chicken balls, slightly hopping in his steps as he told Wonwoo for the fifth time that he’s so happy to get the chicken he’d been craving for. Wonwoo knew he should watch where’s he’s going, but he couldn’t take his eyes off Jun.

He stopped when they passed their school. His gaze stuck at the sight of their school building and the orange sky behind it. A sentimental feeling struck him, his mind going through the days he had spent in the premises, thinking that soon he’d be spending two years as a student there. He thought of the classrooms, the teachers, marching band, Hansol, Seokmin, Jun.

Minghao.

“Do you want to go inside?”

Jun’s voice made Wonwoo realized how he had been standing idly in front of their school. He felt sorry for neglecting Jun and wandering off to his own thoughts.

“The gate’s locked,” he said to Jun’s question.

“We can climb.”

Wonwoo’s shock must’ve been showing on his face. He saw Jun giving him a bashful smile.

Climbing the gate was proven to be a possible task. Wonwoo thought that it should be easier than jumping over the fence at the opposite side of the school ground, but he understood why Minghao chose the latter. There’s always someone watching the entrance gate on school days.

Jun didn’t ask where they were going. To be honest, Wonwoo didn’t have any plan either. He was just following where his steps took him and Jun followed him. They ended up at Wonwoo’s secret spot behind the field.

They sat on the ground, munching on the chicken balls as they chatted. They were here together and Jun was smiling. At that time Wonwoo felt at ease.

“Thank you, Wonwoo.” Jun said after one of their conversations ended. “For today. I had fun.”

Despite the words, Wonwoo noticed how Jun’s smile slightly faltered, he couldn’t help but let his own dropped. Jun seemed to realize Wonwoo’s change and he looked guilty.

“...you seemed not really here at times.”

This time guilt pierced Wonwoo’s chest, he was rendered speechless for a moment.

“I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to...” he said quietly, without confidence. He’s holding onto the small smile Jun gave him.

“It’s okay. I know you just have a lot on your mind. You’re worried.” Wonwoo looked at Jun’s eyes and realized that _he knew_.

“I just...” Jun continued. “I just hope that you don’t bottle it up. I can—I might be able to help you. I don’t know, if you want to talk or something. Anything.”

Jun’s gaze made Wonwoo wonder if this was what being loved felt like. It felt nice and soothing. Wonwoo had the sudden urge to bask in it.

“You don’t have to go through it alone.”

Those words were the answer. The words Wonwoo wanted to convey to Minghao. But he needed to be strong enough to tell them, enough for Minghao lean on, and catch him when he falls.

“Can I...” Wonwoo choked on his words. “I need to be strong... but it’s hard... Can I lean on you for a bit? So I can get back on my feet.”

“Of course.” Jun’s smile was like his gaze, with the exact same sincerity.

Wonwoo didn’t know if he fell first or Jun pulled him. For all he knew, he had his chin on Jun’s shoulder, body between Jun’s legs, back under the soft touch of Jun’s hand. Worries about Minghao’s well-being, disappointment in his own inability to help Minghao, fear of losing Minghao; everything melted away, slowly but sure in Jun’s embrace.

 

**

 

Minghao was back to replying his texts and didn’t object when Wonwoo wanted to visit him again. He told Wonwoo to come before 8, but it was difficult to make time between school and band practice, so Wonwoo ended up visiting on a Sunday. Minghao said it was a good time. When Wonwoo said he’d bring something for lunch and asked what Minghao’s mother liked, Minghao said not to bother since his mother worked on Sundays.

So Wonwoo prepared lunch for two people only. He also dropped by downtown to get some of those chicken balls he had with Jun on their date. Wonwoo blushed at the mere thought of the word “date”.

When he arrived at Minghao’s apartment building, he noticed Mingyu standing near the bottom of the stairs. The taller boy had his shoulder hunched; he somehow looked like a big, sad bear. A ridiculous sight, but Wonwoo couldn’t bring himself to laugh when he walked closer and saw Mingyu’s upset face.

“Mingyu.”

“Ahh!”

Mingyu let out a scream and his body jerked back. Their eyes met and Mingyu looked like he finally recognized Wonwoo.

“Sorry,” said Wonwoo.

“Nah...”

“Just got here, or...?”’

“Going home.”

“Okay. See you then,” said Wonwoo before walking towards the stairs. His steps stopped when Mingyu called him.

“Can you—Uhm... Is he doing okay?” Mingyu looked at him with a mixture of worry and desperation.

Wonwoo was confused. “Didn’t you just see him?”

“I saw him went through the door but when I knocked, he wouldn’t answer...” Mingyu gave an obviously forced laugh. “I guess it’s only natural, you know, I wouldn’t—ehm. Wouldn’t want to meet me either... I just want to know if he’s fine. He was still dragging his legs when I saw him earlier and he’s not replying my text so I don’t know how else to...”

Mingyu let his words hang. Wonwoo felt the frustration and worry, he truly sympathized with Mingyu. 

“He’s okay. His injuries are healing,” said Wonwoo gently. Seeing Mingyu like this affected him more than he thought it would. He tried to sound as reassuring as possible.

The strain on Mingyu’s face was disappearing and his body didn’t look as rigid as before. “That’s good. Good.” He said, almost like to himself.

Before saying goodbye, Mingyu said one more thing.”Wonwoo. Please... take care of him. He trusts you.” Wonwoo sensed bitterness in Mingyu’s voice, but his eyes were sincere.

Wonwoo nodded firmly. It was a vow he made to himself.

 

**

 

It was four days before Minghao’s suspension period ended. Usually Wonwoo would’ve been asleep around this time, but he felt thirsty and left his bed for the kitchen. When he came back, his phone was beeping. A call from Minghao.

“Hey.”

“Hey.” The other end of the line went silent for a while. Wonwoo let it.

“I uh... I’m in your neighborhood.”

Wonwoo couldn’t understand what was Minghao doing, it was almost midnight. But he didn’t hesitate when he said, “Come here. I’ll wait on the door.”

They cut the call and Wonwoo hurried downstairs while trying to not make a sound. He didn’t turn on the lights and it was fine since he’s familiar with everything even in the dark. He reached the front door without any accidents and opened it to wait outside, slightly regretting that he didn’t bring a jacket. Thankfully, Minghao appeared not long after.

They didn’t say anything as they walked into Wonwoo’s room. Minghao plopped down on the floor with his back on the side of Wonwoo’s bed.

“You want anything to drink?” said Wonwoo after he turned on the lights in his room. Minghao shook his head so Wonwoo took a seat on the floor across him.

Minghao looked distraught and like he aged 10 years in just a few days. There’s also a new bruise on his left cheek.

“I didn’t fell from jumping. That leg injury from before.” he said suddenly. He was facing Wonwoo but not really not really looking at Wonwoo’s eyes. There was something like fear in Minghao’s wavering orbs.

“This one too. Not from a fight either. I’ve been in several during first year, with gangs from other school and street kids, but not anymore. Not in a long time.”

Minghao looked like he was struggling to move his lips and say the words, and to be honest, Wonwoo sensed that he wasn’t going to like what Minghao was going to say next. But he wouldn’t waste Minghao’s effort nor this precious moment of Minghao opening up to him.

“It’s my mom.”

Wonwoo thought that he heard something, a big rock hitting the bottom of a pit. Boom and Wonwoo’s stomach fell along with it.

“She’s always angry. Her job. Dad not being here. The alcohol.” Minghao continued. His face didn’t look so strained anymore. All the muscles loosened up, but not from relax. It was as if he was _tired of being tired_ and just, decided to let go.

“I’m angry too. I’m angry—“ He gritted his teeth and his face back to being tensed just a little. “—that I can’t do anything. I don’t even stop her when she hits me.”

It crushed Wonwoo to see Minghao, who had always seemed so confident and sure of himself, looking so fragile and helpless. He tried to find Minghao’s eyes and was glad that Minghao was willing to meet his gaze. Gathering all strength into stomach, Wonwoo told Minghao what Jun said to him almost two weeks ago, making sure his voice was sure, so that Minghao knew.

“You don’t have to go through this alone.”

Minghao just stared before he nodded. It was rather difficult to discern since Minghao’s body was shaking, but he did nod, repeatedly. He kept nodding as tears traveled to his jaws and to the floor below, again and again.


	7. Chapter 7

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The climb was slow, but at least they had each other to hold on to.

They had the whole table for themselves. Jun, Seokmin, and Hansol were having their lunch in the classroom so it was only Wonwoo and Minghao. No other students dared to come to their table. It’s been almost a week since Minghao got back to school and people were colder compared to before Minghao was suspended. Minghao didn’t seem affected though. Or maybe he was, but tried not to let it show. Wonwoo would never know for sure. What’s important was that Minghao was here, talking to him, laughing at his lame jokes. Minghao didn’t choose to be alone anymore.

Minghao’s smile, however, froze in the middle of their conversation. Before Wonwoo could even turn his head and see the reason, Mingyu plopped down on the seat next to him.

“Hey,” he said as he laid his lunchbox on the table. Somewhat surprised, Wonwoo replied with a short hum. Minghao kept his jaws shut tight.

The air around them obviously changed. Students buzzing what must be about Kim Mingyu, the school’s student council secretary, frequenter of top 5 exam result ranking, and one of the most sought heartthrob in 11th grade, just sat down at the same table with Xu Minghao and his quiet friend.

Despite the stares and whispers, Mingyu just kept bringing food into his mouth. Although his tensed shoulders told Wonwoo that Mingyu was at least aware of the attention focused on him.

“Kim Mingyu.” After moments of being silent, Minghao finally spoke up. “Are you in your right mind?” He had his forehead scrunched and lips pursed into a tight knot, but his eyes didn’t show anger as Minghao probably wanted to display. Wonwoo had seen that look before. In fact, he’d seen it in Mingyu when the latter visited Minghao’s house the other day; scared and worried.

Mingyu didn’t look up from his lunch. “My grades aren’t falling. My mind is as sharp and bright as ever.”

Minghao’s jaws tensed. “You’re sitting here.”

It was then when Mingyu looked up. He looked at Minghao, who seemed to be taken aback. Mingyu also seemed surprised when his eyes met Minghao’s; he let his gaze strayed a bit, but eventually took it back to Minghao’s eyes.

“It’s nothing.”

Minghao’s expression fell at the words, followed by worry clouding Mingyu’s face.

“Aah, you ruined my mood,” said Minghao as he gave an annoyed look. Or at least he was trying to. Wonwoo thought that Minghao wasn’t so much of a good actor. “I’m out.” With that, Minghao left the table.

For a while, Mingyu kept staring at the space where Minghao was. It looked like he was having trouble with an awful mix of emotions. When he turned to face Wonwoo though, Mingyu gave a small smile.

“At least he’s not avoiding you,” he said with that awkward smile. Same as Minghao, Mingyu was not a good actor. “He’s not fighting anymore. Right?”

When Wonwoo nodded, Mingyu hummed. “Good. That’s good.” His relieved look was sad.

 

**

  
When Wonwoo saw Minghao’s name on the caller ID, his heart stopped. Minghao had only called him once on the night he opened up to Wonwoo, so Wonwoo expected bad things.

“Hey.” Minghao’s voice didn’t indicate anything unusual, but Wonwoo wasn’t feeling relieved just yet.

He took a seat on his bed and replied, “Hey.”

“I need to copy your physics note tomorrow.”

“Sure.” Wonwoo managed to let out a chuckle even though his heart was beating nervously. “If everyone at school finds out Xu Minghao is copying notes to study...”

“Shut up.” Wonwoo heard a scoff from the other end. “I don’t have any choice. I’m studying by myself now. No tutor. Teachers are helpless--”

A loud sound, like glass breaking, muffled Minghao’s words. It was from Minghao’s end of the line. The nervous beating of Wonwoo’s heart felt painful inside his chest.

“Minghao?”

“I’m fine.” His calm voice did nothing to ease Wonwoo’s heart. Especially when Minghao said, “My Mom’s just having her usual... You know... She hit me, once. I said I won’t accept her hitting me anymore. She just stared. She stared and... I guess she just decided it’s better to go breaking things. I’m in my room. I’m okay.”

“You wanna stay here?”

“Nah.” It was as if Minghao knew Wonwoo was about to protest. He quickly added, “She’ll get tired and sleepy soon. Once the booze really kicks in.”

Wonwoo stayed quiet. Minghao didn’t say anything either. For a while there were only loud bump and sound of things breaking. Wonwoo wondered if the neighbors would file a complaint.

Once again Minghao demonstrated his Wonwoo-mind-reading power. “Good thing neighbors work late until night. They won’t be home at least not before midnight.” Wonwoo scrunched his forehead. There was nothing good about that. What if something went terribly wrong? There won’t be anyone nearby to help.

Wonwoo was about to get on his feet and walk out of his room, mind focused on getting to Minghao when the latter said, “So, have you kissed Jun?”

“Huh?” Wonwoo sat back on his bed, perplexed by Minghao’s sudden question. Usually he would get flustered at such inquiry but he couldn’t.

“He’s probably too shy. You should do it first, for his sake.”

They continued to chat over the phone (or rather, Minghao continued to nag Wonwoo about his love life). It was almost 11 when Wonwoo noticed that there were no more sounds of things getting smashed on the background.

“I’m going to sleep,” said Minghao after a big yawn. “Thanks, Wonwoo.” Despite the worry that tugged Wonwoo’s chest, Minghao’s voice managed to calm him down. For once, he thought things would be okay.

**

 

Minghao came to Wonwoo’s house on a Sunday. It was the only time they were both free. Wonwoo had his band practice and cram school, while Minghao has started working on various part time jobs.  

Despite busy working now, Minghao made time to study. Wonwoo was determined to support him any way he could. Especially after he had heard Minghao’s declaration.

_“I’m not letting Mom hit me again. I’ll do my best to make her change. If she doesn’t change until I graduate, I’m moving out.”_

That day under the tree behind the field, Wonwoo saw the Minghao he had seen jumping over the school fence many months ago. No. This was a different Minghao. This Minghao no longer refrained himself from asking Wonwoo’s help. This Minghao was stronger.

That’s why Wonwoo promised himself to get stronger too. Doing anything he could to support Minghao. Helping him study like today.

Minghao was already inside Wonwoo’s lawn when he stopped on his tracks. His tensed face was directed at the road next to the house. Mingyu’s upper body was visible over the low fence.

“Hi,” greeted Mingyu with a nervous smile. Minghao didn’t show any sign of acknowledgement but a stare and a slight nod.

It was the first time in such a long time that the two interacted. Many times Wonwoo had seen Mingyu tried to initiate conversation but Minghao had put a thicker barrier ever since that day at the cafeteria. Mingyu eventually stopped trying to talk with Minghao and opted to give notes of exam tips and example questions through Wonwoo. He made Wonwoo promise not to tell Minghao that the notes were from him. Wonwoo kept his words but he was sure that Minghao had found out the truth by himself.

 “You look good.” Mingyu said, his voice shook. “I mean, not that you look good, fine, not like that, but good good, as in healthy, which is good.”

Mingyu looked so comical that Wonwoo wanted to laugh. Minghao beat him to it. It was not a teasing laugh. It was free, sincere. Mingyu pouted but Wonwoo saw relief on his eyes.

After he finished laughing, Minghao said, “Are you free now?”

Mingyu’s eyes glinted with expectation as he nodded.

“Can you tutor me? Wonwoo sucks at chemistry.”

When they both smiled widely, Wonwoo felt a surge of relief and happiness.

 

**

 

He’s not the one graduating, but somehow Wonwoo felt sentimental as he stood a good meter away from the circle of people dancing around the bonfire. Most of them were his seniors, dancing in pairs and groups, some had their faces red and wet from tears, but each one of them was smiling.

Among the crowd were Mingyu and Minghao, arms wrapped over each other as their bodies swayed in a tempo slower than everyone. They showing up hand in hand had created quite a fuss, even the seniors seemed to be engrossed in the couple instead of enjoying their last moments at this school. But Mingyu and Minghao only had their gazes at each other, not showing a care to the world. Everyone eventually went back to minding their own business.

Wonwoo stood there looking at Minghao’s graceful movements, watching how the latter exuded positive energy from each motion and the smile on his face. One more year until the deadline that Minghao had decided for himself, Wonwoo recalled his best friend’s words and the promise Wonwoo made for himself. He’d be there for Minghao, through the whole year and many more.

As he let himself drown in the crowded but calming atmosphere, Wonwoo felt a presence approaching him from his right. His heart beat faster when he saw it was Jun; he felt his cheeks warming up from the thought of how Jun still managed to bring that effect to him.

After a “hey” and a smile, they fell into a silence that continued until Jun spoke up first.

“They look happy,” he said with a small smile, gaze directed towards the crowd surrounding the bonfire. Wonwoo knew who he was talking about and hummed his agreement.

“Wonwoo...” Jun’s small smile tensed as he said Wonwoo’s name, letting Wonwoo know that he’s nervous. Wonwoo heart rate went up a notch. He thought maybe Jun was going to beat him and ask him to dance first. But Jun’s words turned out to be something unexpected.

“I can be in second, so...” Jun repeated before turning to face Wonwoo. “...will you be my boyfriend?”

Jun’s eyes were slightly wavering, but they kept gazing at Wonwoo’s. His gaze would usually made Wonwoo’s heart beat even crazier, but this time it made Wonwoo feel calm.

“I’m not choosing first and second,” said Wonwoo gently. “Important people in my life can’t be put into ranks.”

At his words, Jun widened his eyes slightly before casting his gaze downward.

“Of course. It’s ridiculous to make rankings. I’m sorry I’m such a petty person,” he said quietly, his eyes still facing the ground.

With a full smile and a hope to console the boy in front of him, Wonwoo told Jun the truth. “It’s okay. I like you anyway.”

Jun snapped his neck up so fast that Wonwoo thought he was going to break it. When their eyes met once again, Jun’s face was instantly filled with a tinge of red. It was such an endearing sight, Wonwoo didn’t think. He just did what he wanted to do, which is placing his hand on Jun’s left cheek and leaning his face forward.

He could feel Jun shivering through his hand and his lips. Or maybe it was all him; he belatedly realized that from the slight shaking of his left arm that was left dangling on his side. He wasn’t sure. He was too engrossed in Jun’s soft and cherry-flavored lips. Jun had a cherry pie today. Though it was hours ago so Wonwoo wondered if it’s possible that the taste still lingered. Maybe he was just imagining it. Or maybe Jun’s lips were originally cherry-flavored. By the way, Wonwoo had pork stew for lunch today. Did he taste like pork? Did he ruin the mood for? Maybe he should—

A click of a camera put Wonwoo’s thoughts into a halt. He pulled away and caught Jun’s bashful glance before turning his head to the right.

“Oops. Didn’t realize the shutter sound was on.” There stood Minghao with his phone in his raised hand and a panicked Mingyu on his side.

“Minghao! You’re ruining it!”

“I wanted to immortalize it. It’s such an important moment.” He stopped before saying in a smug way. “I feel like a proud parent.”

“Come on. Let’s go and give them some privacy.”

“Okay, okay. They were kind enough to give us privacy when we made out at the council room.”

 Minghao said it nonchalantly but it threw Mingyu into a stuttering mess. “Wha—You mean-- T-they saw it??”

“I was disappointed. They should’ve taken some pictures. Or better, a video. Don’t you want our precious moment to be preserved?”

Mingyu gaped before trying to protest Minghao. They went on into full bickering mode, which was slightly annoying but always endearing, thought Wonwoo.

Wonwoo turned his attention back to Jun on his left. Jun replied Wonwoo’s gaze with his own, and they both burst into laughter. With the warmth of the night and the sound of Jun’s beautiful laughter, Wonwoo felt a sudden surge of confidence. He took his hand out and was about to ask Jun for a dance when Seokmin and Hansol came running towards them, huge grin and excitement plastered to their faces.

“Oh. My. God,” said Seokmin with his eyes bulging out.

“We got another couple!” Hansol clapped his hands and wiggled his body side to side, reminding Wonwoo of a seal.

“When? How? Tell us!”

“He’s so red, I think he’s going to combust, ha ha ha.”

The duo continued to pester a completely flushed Jun, Wonwoo had to tell them to take it slow with the questions. His effort made Seokmin and Hansol turned their attention completely to him, let him take all of their curiosity and excitement instead of Jun. When Seokmin proceeded to recommend popular date spots and couple stuffs, Jun had went from visibly embarrassed to obviously amused.

Wonwoo let his friends continue chattering and diverted his attention towards the other couple nearby. Minghao was petting the neck of a pouting Mingyu. He had a teasing smile and eyes filled with fondness.

Minghao continued to brush his hand over Mingyu’s nape as he turned his head, his eyes meeting Wonwoo’s. Minghao’s teasing smile transformed into a gentle one, and Wonwoo felt his own lips curving up.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for staying with this fic. <3 u all
> 
> I admit this chapter feels kinda rushed. I didn't do much editing after the first draft. I even left it for a long time, kept pending it because I didn't want it to end LOL
> 
> Surprise: there's a bonus epilogue chapter!


	8. epilogue

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> To [alateni](https://archiveofourown.org/users/alateni/pseuds/alateni):  
> I wrote it!! XD  
> I actually wanted to write from Jun and Minghao's POV too, but haven't found the right story.  
> Maybe someday? (no promises!)

Now that the secretary badge was off from his blazer and settled safely on his palm, everything in this room triggered a series of flashback images inside Mingyu’s head. Behind the boy who will receive the badge, there was a modest-sized transparent shelf filled with trophies and plaques at one side and folder maps at the other. Mingyu remembered how the sliding door had been stuck, and then broken, several months ago because somehow it refused to open properly for Mingyu. On the right side of the shelf were three sets of desk computer. He had not break any of those--thank God--Mingyu had fond memories especially with the one nearest the shelf, Mingyu’s partner during the whole year he served as student council’s secretary.

Turning his head further to the right, he saw the image of that one afternoon. Minghao was in front of him, so close that Minghao’s lips were almost touching his. They looked so inviting, he wanted to kiss them so bad. And when his wish was finally realized, he felt warmth—no, heat—transferred from Minghao’s rough lips to his own, then all over his body—

“Mingyu!”

“Whoa!”

Mingyu’s body jolted and the badge fell off his hands, rolling on the floor until it hit the shoe of the junior he’s supposed to hand the badge.

“Sorry!” Mingyu quickly picked up the badge and gave quick bows to all of his colleagues and juniors for his blunder.

“Aah...” The president—correction, the former president Hyungwoo—sighed on his left. “I’m gonna miss seeing you dropping and breaking things in this room.” His gaze was fond as he cooed at Mingyu. Mingyu replied with a pout.

“I’m gonna miss everyone...” The former treasurer Mina whined with her lips curved down.

“We’re still going to the same school for one more year.”

Yeah, but we’re all going to be busy studying,” Mina said before turning to Mingyu with accusing eyes. “And you’ll be busy kissy-kissy and smoochy-smoochy with Minghao,” she added with slightly bitter tone.

Mingyu almost dropped the badge again. “Wha—I, I—“ he managed to clear his throat to regain his composure. “Please stop being petty because you can’t get a boyfriend.” His own voice sounded calm enough, but his heart was still beating erratically against his rib cage.

It was no secret to the school that Mingyu was dating Minghao now, and Mingyu had no intention to hide it. But he was surprised by Mina’s words; it was as if she had been peeking into Mingyu’s head and saw what Mingyu just saw (it had happened many times before, it was creepy). Even as Mingyu loved to show the world that Minghao was his, he wouldn’t want others to see them in their private moments. He’d like to think that those were only for the two of them.

“Rude!” Mina pouted. “I _can_. I just... don’t.” Despite her confident start, her voice trailed off. Everyone laughed at her.

Laughter continued to fill the room every once in a while during the rest of the ceremony, the comfortable air was like the student council itself, warm and soothing. When it ended and Mingyu was out of the room, he felt refreshed. It was indeed an end, but it’s also a new start. So Mingyu didn’t feel sad.

Feeling invigorated, Mingyu headed to the town’s public library, going straight to the reference room at the back of the first floor, because that’s where he’d find Minghao. He was surprised that he couldn’t find Minghao at the table near the chemistry shelf, but when he turned slightly to the left, there Minghao was.

“Hey,” said Mingyu as he walked towards Minghao. He could feel his own lips curving up into a wide grin against his will. He probably looked like an idiot but he couldn’t help it, especially when Minghao lifted his face from his book and looked at Mingyu, giving the most dazzling smile Mingyu had ever seen.

Mingyu took the empty seat beside Minghao. “Which part are you on?”

“Page 67.”

Minghao’s answer made Mingyu raised his eyebrows. “So fast?”

“I skipped part C from the last chapter. You said it rarely comes out in exams.”

“Yes, but it doesn’t mean you should skip it.”

“My brain is not big enough for all of them, Gyu. I just need to cover the basics to get a passing grade.”

“But—“

“Ssh!!”

Mingyu only realized that their bickering was getting too loud when the librarian lady scowled at them from the side. After giving the lady an apologetic look, Mingyu turned back to Minghao. The latter was already back at his books, forehead furrowed in concentration. Mingyu didn’t have the heart to bother him.

To be truth, Mingyu’s insistence stemmed from his own insecurity. He was going to apply for one of the top universities out of town while Minghao was trying for a certificate program in a local university. Minghao’s target university didn’t have requirements as demanding as Mingyu’s, so it made sense to focus only on getting over that university’s passing line.

Mingyu actually hoped for Minghao to do more. Maybe, if he tried hard enough, Minghao could get into _his_ choice of university.

But Mingyu knew it wouldn’t happen. Minghao had his mind set and plans ready to get the independent life he wanted. He even had a clearer vision of his future than Mingyu, the Mingyu whom everyone deemed as a bright student with bright future ahead of him. At this point Mingyu only had a vague images of himself 10 or even 5 years later. What was clear to him was that in every image, Minghao was always with him. He couldn’t help but worry that enrolling in different universities would threaten that dream.

He had never told Minghao about this. He wouldn’t, not today and probably never. But when they walked out of the library later, he knew he had failed in hiding his secret.

“What is it?” asked Minghao from his right.

“What, what?” Mingyu feigned a nonchalant voice, but it didn’t fool Minghao.

“I can hear you thinking.”

Mingyu let a small whine of defeat before saying, “I’m scared that if we go to separate schools we’ll naturally drift apart.”

Mingyu thought he wasn’t scared of endings. But the thought of Minghao and him ending brought a kind of fear he’d never experienced before.

Minghao stopped his steps and scoffed. “You think you can forget me and move on.”

Mingyu didn’t address that and said this instead.”...but you can...” He saw Minghao’s eyes, filled with pure curiosity, and felt his own lips puckered into a pout. “...forget me.”

Minghao’s confused look disappeared as he suddenly scooted closer, slightly tip-toeing so that his grinning face was only a breath away from Mingyu’s. “I won’t and I’ll remind you that, _again_ and _again_.”

“Hao!” Mingyu squealed--how embarrassing--as he took a step back. “Not... Not here...”

Minghao laughed and pulled away, but not too far. They were close enough for their shoulders to bump each other. Minghao took his hand and Mingyu let Minghao hold him as they resumed their steps.

They almost reached the bus station where they would go to their separate ways home, when Minghao stopped to read a text. Mingyu couldn’t see what’s on the screen. Minghao’s expression didn’t change so he thought it was nothing.

But then Minghao said, “I still have a few hours before work and was going to spend it at home, but Mom said she got off work early, trouble with boss, and told me not to come home yet.” Nothing from his expression nor voice suggested any distress, thought Mingyu couldn’t help but worry.

Things did looked good enough. Minghao had told Mingyu what he was dealing with, like his arrangement with his mother whenever his mother was feeling angry. Minghao had been honest and open, and Mingyu was relieved. But Mingyu would always worry. He was never sure that he could read Minghao right, give the support Minghao needed when his mother was going through her usual episodes. What if Minghao was hiding things because Mingyu wasn’t reliable enough? There’s Wonwoo so Minghao should be okay, but what if Wonwoo was too occupied to even pay attention to Minghao?

The trail of unsettling thoughts was forced to a halt when Mingyu felt Minghao’s hands moving away from his own. It was only for a split moment. Soon Minghao’s calloused palm was back on his equally rough hand, readjusting their positions into a firmer hold. A sense of reassurance wrapped Mingyu.

“We’ll work it out. You and me. Me and my mom,” said Minghao gently without diverting his gaze from the street ahead of them.

Meanwhile Mingyu was staring at Minghao’s side profile. He gazed as he held onto Minghao’s hand and the trace of Minghao’s reassuring voice in his ears.

“So _stop worrying_ ,” Minghao said as he moved his body to hit Mingyu on the side, forcing Mingyu to stumble on his feet. The only thing that stopped Mingyu from rolling over the asphalt was Minghao’s insanely strong arm. The beautiful sound of Minghao’s laughter filled the air and Mingyu couldn’t bring himself to whine.

“Let me crash at your place a few hours,” said Minghao after he had his share of laughter.

“Sure. But my parents won’t be home until late and Yuna said she’s going out with friends.”

It happened so fast that Mingyu almost thought he was imagining things, but he could’ve sworn that Minghao had run his tongue over his lips at Mingyu’s answer. For a second Mingyu’s heart went still.

“Good.”

There was no mistaking the mischievous glint on Minghao’s eyes this time. Mingyu thought that while he had wasted his energy worrying about endings and other things, which were possible but less likely than what’s happening in front of him now, he and Minghao moving forward, together, to various new stages of their lives and relationship, could today be another new step? Oh my God, Mingyu was sweating profusely, his hand was sticking to Minghao’s and it felt gross but he couldn’t let go, of course not, he just couldn’t focus on anything but Minghao’s tongue over his lips earlier and his own heart slamming against his rib cage.

Mingyu could only hope that his heart would hold on until they arrived home. He still wanted to live a long life with Minghao.


End file.
